Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
