In the future we'll all be gay
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
