yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I'm both gender and math confused
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
