I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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