Got a toothbrush?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize