I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
