In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
