Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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