Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
