after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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