Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
