Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
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