Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize