we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize