I hate your face
Jerry, you need to find god
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
