Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Randomize
