So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
