Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize