then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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