We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
