Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
