Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
