Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
