my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
