I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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