Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
