Don't you send me to vm
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
