My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
