dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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