they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
so much tequila, so little girl.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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