we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
