Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
