I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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