Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Sext me about skeletons
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
