better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
