At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
