I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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