So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize