She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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