From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
