Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize