dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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