He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
