I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
