My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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