Have you finally orgasmed yet?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
