We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
