you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I think I just sharted jello shots
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
