Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
