Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize