I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize