Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
